Stop killing the vowels!


I was looked at with disgust if I made the fatal error of talking  ‘like a teenager’. My dad used to clip me around the ear if I dropped my t’s.  I was constantly told to speak properly, and oh how I hated my dad for nagging me about it. I can’t thank him enough now though!

Perhaps this is what spawned my profound hatred of band names without vowels. I mean seriously, what is with the countless acts thinking it’s cool to drop them? Word play is clever. Removing vowels is not. It’s just stupid.

I’m not talking acronyms either. I can deal with those.  M83 is off the hook too as it stands for something. (Messier 83 is a galaxy 15 million light years away, in case you didn’t know).

MSTKRFT, MGMT, SBTRKT, TNGHT and Sydney’s FLWRGN: I’m looking at you! By the way, that last one is pronounced, Flower Gun. Which is a pretty cool name when spelt properly.

I judge moronic women’s magazines by their covers, and because I know they’re full of mindless crap. And if a band has a stupid name, I can’t help but judge the people behind it too. It’s a shame because some of their music is good.  But I can’t help but think they must be morons.

Collarbones had a great track last year called Kill Off The Vowels. But I say bring them back. You wouldn’t start plucking notes from bars of music, or frames of video from films clips, so why, why, WHY do it with letters? Oh yeah it’s like, so cool,  yar. And so clever. Sorry, clvr. About as cool as glasses with no lenses, dickheads.

And don’t even get me started on the LOL Boys.

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